WSJ article - Some Date: How Homecoming Is Losing Out to Hanging Out

Terrific article by Jeff Zaslow How Homecoming Is Losing Out to Hanging Out. He writes as the concerned and involved father of three teenage girls about issues that teen girls are dealing with in an evolving culture of dating.

When working with teen clients and their parents on different school and social issues dating comes up at some point. Some teens aren't comfortable talking about it right away but inevitably it's a topic that needs to be addressed. Teens are discovering their identities in many areas and dating is one area that needs to be talked about earlier rather than later.

The behavior that a girl accepts and becomes comfortable with early on can effect her dating behavior as she gets older. Assertiveness, self-esteem and respect, self-knowledge, self-worth and a sense of direction all impact her choices.

Most girls and young women have difficulty navigating the dating terrain and when working with adult clients through Daily Life Consulting it is amazing how much of adult behavior clients attribute to dating patterns that were set years, sometimes decades, before.

Life Skills for Teen Girls: Begin from where you are speaking with your daughters about dating and the social scene they're involved with.

Find ways and programs to encourage and develop their assertiveness, self-esteem, self-respect, self-knowledge, self-worth, sense of direction, education goals, career aspirations, family, relationship and cultural goals and desires. Do it now. It's the perfect time to start no matter what's gone before. You can't change the past but you can impact the future.

Good luck and please email me with any thoughts, suggestions, questions or comments at rebecca at dailylifeconsulting dot com

RK

Fashion Bullies Attack -- In Middle School - Wall Street Journal

Fashion Bullies Attack -- In Middle School. Terrific article in the Wall Street Journal.

It's hard to believe that this kind of behavior exists but it absolutely does. Middle School can be such a difficult time for girls and it's getting harder and harder. The internal and external pressures build and there are new pressures all the time. Fashion is fast becoming one of the real toughies.

When working with teen and tween clients and their parents we work on one of the very necessary life skills that a girl has to learn at this age which is assertiveness in addition to a sense of self. If a girl has a sense of who she is but isn't able to withstand the pressures of her peers or the media she will quickly lose that sense of selfhood.


The article also mentions the book "The Hundred Dresses" by Eleanor Estes which was written in 1944. I taught that book as part of a reading curriculum to immigrant children in a very urban area. They loved it! I think it's a great book with lots of great life lessons for children of all ages.

Tip To Try:

*If you're going shopping this weekend begin a dialogue with your daughter about fashion and fashion pressures.

*Don't expect too much information. Don't even ask for any just get the lines of communication open on this topic so that somewhere in the near future you can have a real conversation about it. If you jump right in chances are she'll jump right out.

Enjoy the weekend,
RK